Prepare your Fat Asses...

The top image when you Google "Big Fat Fattie"

I have big things planned for Idiot At Play, this cute litle 'blog of mine. Big things indeed.

Firstly, I have a redesign in mind. Well, I guess it should be considered more of a "design" considering I used one of the canned templates that Blogger provides to each of it's members. However, after considering many things in my life, I consultated Jay over at The Sexy Armpit and asked his advice on Blog-Style Layout Design (a topic on which he is thoroughly schooled) and he assures me that my plans are not terribly difficult to enact upon. Which is a good thing.

Secondly, I will have a focus. Granted, my focus will come through in my inane ramblings about things that I find important but few others agree. But there will be a focus. What exactly that focus will be, dear readers, has yet to be established.

Thirdly, there is no thirdly. I really only thought about the other two things. I've never been one to plan ahead, so two things is kind of pushing it for me. But it's definitely a start.

Prepare for the future, friends. It comes.

Volunteer work wanted...

Since I found out that my store is closing and that I will be out of a job by August, I haven't done much job searching. Yes, I do have three months lead time, which should be plenty of time to find something new. And I am confident that I can easily find another job in retail.

The problem is, I don't want retail.

I have a degree in Graphic Design, which I haven't used since I got it besides for a few freelance jobs. What I do want is a career in graphic design, with a company that I can trust and will give me a chance.

But how do I get that with the limited experience I have? I go on Monster.com and Hotjobs,com and all I find are jobs that require three years experience. Five years experience. Ten years experience. How do I get the experience without the job?

This is why my impending layoff is a good thing. I will get my severance with the company, then I can collect unemployment. Bills won't be much of an issue, so i can cover what I need to with the government's help. Then I figure that I will have time to volunteer my time with a graphic design company or any company with an in-house graphics department. This will allow me the opportunity to learn the industry from the inside and gain the experience that companies desire. I can also amass more graphic work that I can put into my portfolio, which of course is a benefit.

This has been my biggest issue since college. I needed to work full time in order to pay for my expenses, so I never had the opportunity to take advantage of internships, which I suppose is where most of the experience of a college grad comes from. I finally have the chance to do this, so I see the layoff as a blessing.

I also doubt it would be difficult to find a company who doesn't want a volunteer. The economy sucks but people need labor. So here comes a guy (me) who is willing to work for free and knows quite a bit about graphic design.

It's a win/win.

Gonna get me a Slurpee... Today!!

I don't know how it got past me for as long as it did, but I just discovered yesterday that 7-11 has a promotional flavor for the X-Men Origins: Wolverine movie. Now, being the comic book geek that I am, I need this. Not for the Slurpee, mind you, but for the three collector's cups.

For almost every Marvel movie that has come out, I have collected the Slurpee cups. I have the set from X-Men 3. I have the set for Spider-Man 3. I have the set for Iron Man. I even have one from the Hulk (which may be my favorite because it changes color when introduced to cold liquid.)

I mean, the fact that it is a Slurpee really helps with me wanting one. It seems that every summer I become addicted to the frozen sugary treats. Even though the weather right now does not warrant drinking a cool-down drink like the Slurpee, it doesn't matter. I need those cups.

I need 'em.

Hopefully they will have the collector's straws too, like they did for Iron Man.

What the hell was wrong with me?

I created this blog about two years ago. I never really did much with it, and I began wondering why I even created it. Looking over the very few posts that I wrote, I remembered the motivation behind it.

Apparently, I created this blog in order to get other people to sign up for those Paid to Click and Paid to Surf the Internet programs that are out there. Looking back on my life, I can't believe ow much time I invested in those things. I thought that it was the greatest thing at the time. "You mean I click links, and you give me money for it?" I saw dollar signs and thought I would never have to work again.

Yeah, right.

I spent probably two years working with a handful of sites, slaving away at the links in the e-mails, visiting the sites everyday clicking whatever I could. What do I have to show for it.

Two things. Jack and shit.

Though there are a few that I still do, and that I have gotten paid for, I don't know how I ever thought I would get rich from those things. (Though getting gift cards from that one site is pretty cool.)

If you can find this legitimate programs, then I encourage you to sign up. Some of them do work, though I won't post them here, if for no other reason than to prove to myself that I have turned over a new leaf.

Anyway, the purpose of this post is to tell you all that most of those sites are scams. Avoid them is possible. Yeah, it may seem insignificant clicking links to make a tenth of a penny, but all that time adds up. And the trade off really isn't worth it.

Happy Tax Day!

Well, not really happy, but the other part of that is true.

Let me tell you why today is not happy. I just learned that the IRS denied my tax return. Why? Because I did not receive that lovely stimulus package that all of America got back in the middle of 2008. Yet they claim that I did.

You may be confused, saying "If you didn't get it, why didn't you say anything?" Honestly, I didn't care. I was hopeing to receive the $600, but it wasn't my money so there was no big loss involved on my part by not receiving it. However, had I known that it would have caused this huge controversy now, you bet your ass I would have called and said I didn't get that shit.

Now, I have to file an extension and search my bank records (for an account that I no longer have) because the gub'ment says that it was deposited directly into my account.

This is shit. I didn't want the money. I didn't get the money. Now, the money I do want is being withheld from me because of this.

Screw you, George W. Bush.

Miley Cyrus, you dumb broad, you.

So as I was reading yesterday's edition of the Daily News, I came across a blurb about Miley Cyrus and her opinion of the Alice in Wonderland movie. She basically proclaimed that it was all about Ecstasy and drug use. Her argument: look it up on the internet.

There are so many flaws with her thinking that it is not even funny. Does she believe everything she reads on the internet? Let's test that theory, shall we?

Billy Ray Cyrus is a child fondling drunk. (OK, maybe not the best example.)

Miley Cyrus is pregnant. (Probably not too good either.)

I got it. Miley Cyrus is a talented singer. That works.

See? Not everything you read on the internet is true. Just because someones twisted mind believes that Alice is Wonderland is about drug use does not mean that is the point of the story. Yes, there is drug use in it, like the hookah smoking caterpillars, but that was not necessarily Lewis Carroll's intention when he wrote it. Alice in Wonderland was written as a fantasy story to entertain children, which it has done for well over 100 years now and has spawned numerous retellings, revisions, and versions. Just because you don't get it, Miley, doesn't mean you should pervert it. How about trying to understand it by looking at the symbolism and getting to know the story.

Or has playing Hannah Montana rotted your brain that thoroughly?

Stuff at eBay!

Help a brotha out, y'all! I just put an auction up on eBay and I wouldn't mind if you can spread it around and see what kind of scratch I can make from it. There will be more to come in the future, so add me as a favorite seller.

Check out the auction here.

Thanks all.