4/29/2009

Three Stars for Wolverine


Check out the New York Post today for a review of X-Men Origins: Wolverine. I must admit that I was a little surprised that it got a 3 star rating.

When I first saw the trailer for Wolverine, even though I was excited as hell, I was a little skeptical. There was so much action and so much going on that I was worried it would be completely plotless. But after reading the review, my fears were slightly assuaged. The review gives a succinct plot synopsis (don't read if you want no spoilers) and it sounds pretty solid. The relationship between Wolverine and Sabretooth is fleshed out a bit, which sort of makes me happy.

Needless to say, I am overly excited about this movie. But I'm afraid that I will still be disappointed. This has happened before. When the first Fantastic Four movie came out, I realy didn't give a shit about it, because I expected nothing. After I saw it, I loved it, even though I think I was the only one. When they announced a second FF movie, I got super psyched and couldn't wait to see it, and was highly let down by the steamy pile of turd that it was.

I'm just afraid of being let down by Wolverine.

Marvel's track record for movies has been great, with a few exceptions (I'm looking at you Elektra and Ghost Rider). So I guess I shouldn't be too worried. And I doubt Marvel will allow their cash cow to be half-assed just for the sake of making a movie.

Anyway, if you want to read the review, go here. I'll definitely be seeing this on Friday.

4/28/2009

PG Porn

A short time ago I (and many other people) received a Tweet from Ed Brubaker about a new episode of PG Porn. Never having heard of this particular brand of porn, I decided to investigate. What I found was a collection of the most hilarious short films on the internet.

If you don't know what PG Porn is, it is the brain-child of James Gunn. The tag-line says it all: "For people who love everything about porn, except the sex."

The videos feature actors and actresses getting themselves into porn-style situations without that annoying copulation to ruin the mood.

Unfortunately, I was at work at the time of this discovery so I was not able to view all of the videos on the site. But I did get the chance to watch Peanus, a spoof of the Peanuts characters, as well as A Very Peanus Christmas. Besides the inclusion of real life porn star Bella Donna as Lucy in these shorts, Michael Rosenbaum from TV's Smallville plays a spot-on Charlie Brown.

After these two, I watched the helpful bus, in which Havana Bob and Jason help stranded pedestrians find their destinations.

If you have the chance, check out these videos. They are hot damn hilarious.

4/27/2009

What a weekend!

As you may be aware, this past Sunday was spent by my girlfriend and me moving our furniture out of the apartment. I have been dreading this day for a few weeks now for a few reasons. The first being the daunting task that moving is. Last year we did not finish until nearly midnight and I almost died in the process going up and down three flights of stairs as many times as I did. The second reason is that it means living with her parents is inescapable at this point.

With the Sunday that I knew I would have, I wanted to have a decent Saturday, getting things accomplished without too much hassle.

Yeah. That didn't happen.

Early Saturday morning, I took my car to Pep Boys for some routine work. I needed quite a few things done, the most important of which being new brakes. I got there around 8 AM and most of it was done fairly quickly. I was told by Joe (who is a really nice guy and there every time I bring my car to Pep Boys) that I need new rotors in the front and new drums in the back. The rotors they had in stock but the drums they had to order, and it would take a couple hours to receive them.

No problem. The front brakes were most necessary to stop the violent shaking that occurred when I brake from anything over 30 MPH. I tell him to change those, but that I will bring my car in next Saturday (which is Free Comic Book day, by the way) and have the drums changed then.

This exchanged occurred around 10 AM. Thankfully, I brought my DS and Pokemon Platinum with me, knowing that I would be there for a good three hours.

At around 1 PM, my car is done.

Five hours to fix my car and it isn't even finished. Now, I can't really complain because it's driving much better. And to be honest, they never gave me a time estimate on when it will be completed. I expected three hours, I got five. It is what it is.

At this point I wanted to get home and pack up some more shit and move some boxes to our storage unit. What I came home to was my girlfriend's best friend, high on Ecstasy and drinking straight Bacardi.

At 2 in the afternoon. What the fuck is this?

I just left, knowing that boxes in the storage unit needed to be rearranged. I head over there and spend a couple of hours making room for our furniture. By the time I get back, my girlfriend had kicked her friend in the ass and gotten her to pitch in a little. We start packing up boxes and make a couple trips to both the storage unit and my girlfriend's parents house.

The night goes smoothly and we eventually go to sleep.

Which brings us to Sunday.

For the most part, Sunday wasn't too bad. Everyone got to our place around 10 AM and we packed up the truck with crap going to the storage unit fairly quickly. We get there, unload, and decide to go to lunch. Two of our party decide to go home saying they have some things to do. We tell them we will call when we finish lunch and they say they will meet us back at the apartment.

After lunch, they say something came up and they can't make it back. OK. No problem. Not like we were paying them or anything. Whatever help they gave us was appreciated.

We get back to the apartment and learn that our entertainment center will not pass through the stairwell, forcing us to take it apart and load it piece by piece into the truck. We do that, run into very few other wrinkles and bring everything to the house.

Let me tell you something about Ikea furniture. Getting them apart is one of the simplest things in life. Putting them together is a bitch and a half.

It took us about an hour to get the entertainment center back together, and it only took that long because my girlfriend's uncle was at the house installing cabinets and he had a nail gun with him. If it wasn't for him, that piece of shit would be sitting outside on the curb now.

We get the rest of the furniture in but I needed a couple of pieces to attach. Not having very good light in our room, I ask Uncle for his flashlight. He tells me to be careful because what he has is a flashlight/pepper spray dispenser.

Guess which button I pushed?

Wondering why the light isn't working, I steady it on my hand, hold the button, and get a yellow brown stream of liquid against my hand. Pepper spray splashed on my arms and wafted up to my face, causing an uncomfortable sting. Unfortunately my friends who helped us move were standing in the room and received the same uncomfortable sting. What a way to thank them for their hard work, huh? "I appreciate your help, guys. Have some pepper spray."

That was about the end of the day. Twelve hour after starting, we called it a wrap. My girlfriend and I spent the night in our empty apartment with our cat and had a decent nights sleep in quite a while. Even though we have more work to do, I'm not worrying about it too much. We have the next four days to take care of things.

4/24/2009

It's almost moving day.

I managed to get this weekend off from work because Sunday is the "big" day. Yep, this weekend will be hell.

Tonight we have a few errands to run, like returning a couple of things to Home Depot. My girlfriend wants to exchange a chrome outlet cover plate and get one that looks like a rock. The reasoning behind this is because there is a large, taped off portion of the wall that can be seen through the paint in which lies an electrical outlet. My idea was to paint the taped portion so that it looks like a picture frame, than paint some kind of picture on it. She wants to get the rock looking thing so that we can do some kind of meadow theme with trees and shit.

After that we have a rummage sale to go to in an attempt to purchase a throw rug for 50 cents. Yeah, that's just what I want; someone else's dirty-ass carpet laid out in my new room. But it's what my lady wants to do.

Tomorrow consists of me taking my car to Pep Boys for a much needed oil change and an even more needed brake job. I figure I will go over around 8:00AM and hopefully be the first customer. I will probably get out of there around noon, at which point we head over to the storage unit and shuffle shit around to make room for the furniture and other stuff we need to put in there. We also need to make time to throw shit out. We collect so much garbage that I have no idea how I got through life with all of my junk. (Be on the lookout for some eBay auctions in the future.)

I got the U-Haul reserved and I'll be picking it up around 9:00 AM on Sunday. A couple of my friends will be coming over and the plan is to get the furniture out. We don't need to vacate until Thursday, but we need to get everything out so that we can get a good cleaning going on. My girlfriend and I kinda live like pigs. When we moved from our last apartment, we only got half of the security deposit back because the management said that there was "lots of garbage removal" (that was actually written on the bill). Which is bullshit because, yes, it needed to be vacuumed, but there was no fucking garbage in the place. So this time we are trying to avoid that and will be scrubbing down everything during the week.

I will probably be updating minimally here until next Friday. Trust me, all of this will be done on Friday, just in time for the release of X-Men Origins: Wolverine. I will be back for that with a review.

Also, head to a comic book store on Saturday, May 2nd. It's Free Comic Book Day. Just go in and they give you shit. I love the comics industry.

4/23/2009

I got a psuedo-job interview tomorrow...

Most of my interviewers are this uninterested as well./
So about a half an hour after I get to work, my cell phone rings. Seeing that it is a local number I answer and the lady on the other end tells me that she saw my resume on Monster.com and would like me to come in for an interview. Hating my job as much as I do, and knowing that I will be unemployed by the end of July anyway, I take the information. My manager, who is sitting right next to me as I am on the phone, asks me the name of the company and, after hearing it, tells me not to bother. Here's why.

He tells me a story about how he went on an interview for the same company, American Income Life. When he first got there, he met with a person for the interview and was told that he is perfect for their company. Bear in mind that he has done security and retail in his career and has no experience with life insurance, or any insurance for that matter. How is he "perfect?" After that "interview" he joins a group and listens to one man speak for about a half an hour about how much money he has made with the company. He decides that it's garbage and leaves, despite being there for about three hours.

After listening to his story, I decide to do a little research online. I Google the phrase "American Income interview," and the very first hit I get is this.

I read it. I didn't like what I read. I decided to check out a couple more entries on that page. I finally come to this post, which really helped to set my decision in stone.

This was written by a person who, from what I can tell, was with the company for about a year. He describes the nightmare of a company American Life really is. He talks about the amount of money he had to spend out of pocket with little return, even though he was promised that he would make about $60K in his first year. However, my favorite line in the entire thing is this:

"The state director made advances on my girlfriend."

What the fuck kind of company is this? I was told to dress in business professional for the interview. This is how you express professionalism? By hitting on an employee's girlfriend?

I decided not to go to the interview. Then about 20 minutes ago, I got another call, again from a local number, with a recorded message confirming my appointment for tomorrow. Are they this hard-up for people to show up to their interviews? If they wanted me to believe that what I was going to was actually an interview, then there would be no need for a reminder. And it certainly wouldn't be a recording. And not at 8:30 at night.

Screw them. Yes, I need a job. But not one like this.

Movie news...

So two new updates came through the Twitter wire this morning from Geektyrant.com, and both of them are very exciting.

First up, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles will be back on the big screen. In 2011. In live-action mode. (You can read about it here.)

So awesome. Having grown up on TMNT, anything that they do I absolutely fall in love with. I remember going to see the first movie after school with a couple of my friends and I saw blown away by it, even when I had no idea what the phrase "blown away" even meant. And I couldn't be more excited that it is going to be live-action. Don't get me wrong. I loved the CG movie from a few years ago, and I thought the comic book tie ins that they had was a stroke of genius. But, in my mind, nothing beats live action.

News number 2: casting continues on Michael Bay's remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street, and they have finally cast Nancy. An unknown actress named Rooney Mara won the role.

I hadn't heard too much about this move until two weeks ago when they announced that Jackie Earle Haley will be playing Freddy. After seeing Watchmen, I can definitely get behind this casting. Haley played a great psycho as Rorschach, and I can't wait to see him as Freddy.

Even though this is a remake, I would see this film. Michael Bay has gained a little more respect from me after what he did with transformers, so I would like to see his take on Elm Street.
Thanks to Geektyrant for this news.

4/22/2009

Spider-Man 4-D?

When you Google "Spider-Man 4D" you get...nightmares.
Probably not, considering the fourth dimension is time. But GeekTyrant.com sent out a Tweet a few hours ago stating the possibility that Spider-Man 4 will be in 3-D.

Before I read the article, I had mixed feelings about this. Seeing Spider-Man in 3-D seems like it would be an awesome feat. However, does that mean they will scrimp on the content and storyline just for spectacular effects? It's possible. Though I never saw Journey to the Center of the Earth with Brendan Frasier in 3-D, I did eventual see it on DVD. That was a terrible movie, one that even the addition of another dimension could not salvage. Please don't do that to Spider-Man.

However, after readng the article, it seems like the only reason they would consider turning Spidey 3-D is to charge more money for tickets. What the hell is this? The quote from the article reads, "People are paying a premium to see movies in 3-D and that’s a very big deal. It’s never been done before that someone says you have to pay more to see Spider-Man than a romantic comedy."

Come on. If you only want to do this shit so you can charge more, than screw you. Though it would be difficult, I would boycott Spider-Man 4. And anyone who knows me knows that I men business when I say that.

Anyway, read the article and decide for yourself.

4/21/2009

Bob Ross is a friggin' liar...

There is no such thing as The Joy of Painting. Trust me. I did it for the past two days.

Of course, my painting was much different than Mr. Ross' panting.

My girlfriend and I have been prepping our new room over at her parent's house. Due to some financial troubles, we need to abandon our current domicile and move in with her mother and father. This is not an excitement for me; I have lived on my own for the last four years with all kinds of space to myself. Now, I am going to be confined to one little room with barely enough space to bend over and fart. But we have to do what we have to do.

I just feel bad for my cat. He won't be able to run around the house because of the pit bull/Godzilla hybrid they have. I just hope that the dog gets along with him. My biggest fear is to come home one day and find fur and cat blood all over the house.

But I digress. Yesterday we began to spackle and paint the room because hot damn if it didn't need it. We went back there again today to put the second coat up. Tomorrow consists of going to the fabric store and buying enough fabric to cover one wall, painting the stone around the base of the other three walls, touching up the moulding around the door, sweeping and vacuuming the carpet, and setting up the bed.

And all of this cannot happen until after 6 PM.

I guess it won't be so bad. I have had to wake up at 5:30 AM to get to work today and tomorrow, but Thursday I get to sleep in a little, so we can work later tomorrow night if need be. But, I still need to pack the rest of my shit in the apartment so we can move all of the furniture out on Sunday.

Moving sucks. If you don't have to do it, don't do it.

Thanks for blowing my budget, Nintendo.

In my quest to "catch 'em all," I have attended most, if not all, of the Pokemon giveaways and special events in my area. I travelled to Boston during the Red/Blue days to get a Mew. I went to Manhattan a couple times for Deoxys and someone else (whom I cannot recall at this moment). I've gone to my local Toys R Us a bunch of times to get whoever they were giving away. And though I really, really want to get Pokemon Platinum, I just don't have the money. I planned on getting it during July, right before I go on vacation, so I have something to do on the plane. However, because of this...



...I'm going to have to move that purchase up to this week.

It shouldn't be too bad. I get paid on Friday so I should have the money for the game. But I also have moving expenses to pay, like the U-Haul truck. And X-Men Origins: Wolverine hits theaters next Friday, so I need money for that...

Sweet Jesus. Nintendo must hate me.

Anyway, If you have Pokemon Platinum, head over to Toys R Us this week and get your secret key. I'm sure it's going to be worth the trip. And maybe you just might see me there. (Who am I kidding? I'll be there.)

Get ready to Block and Roll!!

An article in USA Today confirmed the release of one of the oddest match-ups in video games to date. Lego Rock Band is in production with a likely release date for the holidays of this year.

I guess you could say I'm excited about this game. Rock Band is awesome. The Lego games are awesome. Hell, Legos in general are awesome. This is a strange product, but I can definitely see some greatness in it.

Lego Rock Band will be available on the XBox 360, Wii, PS3, and the DS. According to the article, you can customize not only your rocker, but also your roadies and management. The article also lists five of the songs available, but stated that a full set list has not been determined.

The Final Countdown and Kung Fu Fighting together? This just became the greatest Rock Band ever made.
(Edit: to add cool Lego rock star image. Image C. Warner Bros.)

4/20/2009

Wolverine and the X-Men on DVD tomorrow

Get ready everyone. Tomorrow is the release of the first three episodes of Wolverine and the X-Men on DVD. If you've never seen the show, then listen up. I'm about to school you.

The day Wolverine decides to leave the X-Men, a mysterious explosions claims Professor X and Jean Grey. Distraught with the loss of their friend and mentor, the X-Men disband, going their separate ways.

In the year that follows, however, growing tensions between mutants and humans brings the X-Men back together, with Wolverine leading them. They face many threats from their past as well as all new dangers. They battle ferociously to stave off a future where mutants and humans are dominated by the robotic creatures known as Sentinels.

Sounds like a cool show, huh? Well, it is.

At first I was a little skeptical about Wolverine and the X-Men. Anyone who knows the comics knows that Wolverine is not the leader type. I figured that this was Marvel's way to cash in on his popularity by making him he star (which is fine with me as long as they made it decent). But after watching the first half of season one, I am definitely a fan.

The show begins in the middle of the drama, and pieces things together as it goes along. What caused the explosion? Where are the Professor and Jean? Who is responsible? Most of the show concentrates on answering these questions, which gives it a purpose from the beginning.

I also like the amount of characters in the show. Other X-Men based cartoons seemed to concentrate on the same few characters; the core team of X-Men. But Wolverine and the X-Men uses a whole host of others, making it a much more diverse show. Marrow, Domino, Emma Frost. All of these ladies play a huge role in the show. Not to mention the smaller roles filled by newer characters like Hellion, Mercury, and even Sammy the Squidboy.

As far as the X-Men go, I've loved each show that hit the airwaves. X-Men: The Animated Series was a true marvel (pun intended) because of it's loyalty to the source material. X-Men: TAS first came on he air around the time I started reading comics, so learning about all of these other storylines helped to add fuel to the fire.

Though i may be flogged for saying this, X-Men Evolution was a good show too. I liked the re-envisioning of the X-Men into younger versions of themselves. While the X-Men are mature and hardened by the world, X-Men Evolution gave us characters that were immature and got into trouble based on decisions that they never would have made if not for the folly of youth. Shamefully, Evolution was cut short without realizing it's full potential.

Now, Wolverine and the X-Men draws the best traits from both shows. It closely follows the source materials, from the Days of Future Past type storyline to Magneto being the sovereign of Genosha. Of course changes are made so that the stories make sense.

But I also like the re-imagining of the characters themselves. Forge is a younger, hipper version of himself. Cyclops becomes a brooding loner. Wolverine helms the X-Men and keeps them together. The changes to the characters, and the addition of new characters, keeps the show fresh and entertaining.

If you haven't had the chance to see Wolverine and the X-Men, you need to check it out. Pick up the first three episodes and I'm sure you will be hooked. Amazon has it for less than ten bucks, which is a damn good price for the disc.

Wolverine and the X-Men is an overall great show. I can't wait for Season 2; rumor has it the Age of Apocalypse storyline takes place. Awesome.

4/17/2009

Prepare your Fat Asses...

The top image when you Google "Big Fat Fattie"
I have big things planned for Idiot At Play, this cute litle 'blog of mine. Big things indeed.

Firstly, I have a redesign in mind. Well, I guess it should be considered more of a "design" considering I used one of the canned templates that Blogger provides to each of it's members. However, after considering many things in my life, I consultated Jay over at The Sexy Armpit and asked his advice on Blog-Style Layout Design (a topic on which he is thoroughly schooled) and he assures me that my plans are not terribly difficult to enact upon. Which is a good thing.

Secondly, I will have a focus. Granted, my focus will come through in my inane ramblings about things that I find important but few others agree. But there will be a focus. What exactly that focus will be, dear readers, has yet to be established.

Thirdly, there is no thirdly. I really only thought about the other two things. I've never been one to plan ahead, so two things is kind of pushing it for me. But it's definitely a start.

Prepare for the future, friends. It comes.

Volunteer work wanted...

Since I found out that my store is closing and that I will be out of a job by August, I haven't done much job searching. Yes, I do have three months lead time, which should be plenty of time to find something new. And I am confident that I can easily find another job in retail.

The problem is, I don't want retail.

I have a degree in Graphic Design, which I haven't used since I got it besides for a few freelance jobs. What I do want is a career in graphic design, with a company that I can trust and will give me a chance.

But how do I get that with the limited experience I have? I go on Monster.com and Hotjobs,com and all I find are jobs that require three years experience. Five years experience. Ten years experience. How do I get the experience without the job?

This is why my impending layoff is a good thing. I will get my severance with the company, then I can collect unemployment. Bills won't be much of an issue, so i can cover what I need to with the government's help. Then I figure that I will have time to volunteer my time with a graphic design company or any company with an in-house graphics department. This will allow me the opportunity to learn the industry from the inside and gain the experience that companies desire. I can also amass more graphic work that I can put into my portfolio, which of course is a benefit.

This has been my biggest issue since college. I needed to work full time in order to pay for my expenses, so I never had the opportunity to take advantage of internships, which I suppose is where most of the experience of a college grad comes from. I finally have the chance to do this, so I see the layoff as a blessing.

I also doubt it would be difficult to find a company who doesn't want a volunteer. The economy sucks but people need labor. So here comes a guy (me) who is willing to work for free and knows quite a bit about graphic design.

It's a win/win.

4/16/2009

Gonna get me a Slurpee... Today!!

I don't know how it got past me for as long as it did, but I just discovered yesterday that 7-11 has a promotional flavor for the X-Men Origins: Wolverine movie. Now, being the comic book geek that I am, I need this. Not for the Slurpee, mind you, but for the three collector's cups.

For almost every Marvel movie that has come out, I have collected the Slurpee cups. I have the set from X-Men 3. I have the set for Spider-Man 3. I have the set for Iron Man. I even have one from the Hulk (which may be my favorite because it changes color when introduced to cold liquid.)

I mean, the fact that it is a Slurpee really helps with me wanting one. It seems that every summer I become addicted to the frozen sugary treats. Even though the weather right now does not warrant drinking a cool-down drink like the Slurpee, it doesn't matter. I need those cups.

I need 'em.

Hopefully they will have the collector's straws too, like they did for Iron Man.

4/15/2009

What the hell was wrong with me?

I created this blog about two years ago. I never really did much with it, and I began wondering why I even created it. Looking over the very few posts that I wrote, I remembered the motivation behind it.

Apparently, I created this blog in order to get other people to sign up for those Paid to Click and Paid to Surf the Internet programs that are out there. Looking back on my life, I can't believe ow much time I invested in those things. I thought that it was the greatest thing at the time. "You mean I click links, and you give me money for it?" I saw dollar signs and thought I would never have to work again.

Yeah, right.

I spent probably two years working with a handful of sites, slaving away at the links in the e-mails, visiting the sites everyday clicking whatever I could. What do I have to show for it.

Two things. Jack and shit.

Though there are a few that I still do, and that I have gotten paid for, I don't know how I ever thought I would get rich from those things. (Though getting gift cards from that one site is pretty cool.)

If you can find this legitimate programs, then I encourage you to sign up. Some of them do work, though I won't post them here, if for no other reason than to prove to myself that I have turned over a new leaf.

Anyway, the purpose of this post is to tell you all that most of those sites are scams. Avoid them is possible. Yeah, it may seem insignificant clicking links to make a tenth of a penny, but all that time adds up. And the trade off really isn't worth it.

Happy Tax Day!

Well, not really happy, but the other part of that is true.

Let me tell you why today is not happy. I just learned that the IRS denied my tax return. Why? Because I did not receive that lovely stimulus package that all of America got back in the middle of 2008. Yet they claim that I did.

You may be confused, saying "If you didn't get it, why didn't you say anything?" Honestly, I didn't care. I was hopeing to receive the $600, but it wasn't my money so there was no big loss involved on my part by not receiving it. However, had I known that it would have caused this huge controversy now, you bet your ass I would have called and said I didn't get that shit.

Now, I have to file an extension and search my bank records (for an account that I no longer have) because the gub'ment says that it was deposited directly into my account.

This is shit. I didn't want the money. I didn't get the money. Now, the money I do want is being withheld from me because of this.

Screw you, George W. Bush.

4/14/2009

Miley Cyrus, you dumb broad, you.

So as I was reading yesterday's edition of the Daily News, I came across a blurb about Miley Cyrus and her opinion of the Alice in Wonderland movie. She basically proclaimed that it was all about Ecstasy and drug use. Her argument: look it up on the internet.

There are so many flaws with her thinking that it is not even funny. Does she believe everything she reads on the internet? Let's test that theory, shall we?

Billy Ray Cyrus is a child fondling drunk. (OK, maybe not the best example.)

Miley Cyrus is pregnant. (Probably not too good either.)

I got it. Miley Cyrus is a talented singer. That works.

See? Not everything you read on the internet is true. Just because someones twisted mind believes that Alice is Wonderland is about drug use does not mean that is the point of the story. Yes, there is drug use in it, like the hookah smoking caterpillars, but that was not necessarily Lewis Carroll's intention when he wrote it. Alice in Wonderland was written as a fantasy story to entertain children, which it has done for well over 100 years now and has spawned numerous retellings, revisions, and versions. Just because you don't get it, Miley, doesn't mean you should pervert it. How about trying to understand it by looking at the symbolism and getting to know the story.

Or has playing Hannah Montana rotted your brain that thoroughly?
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